Do you know that sound... the sound of the front door opening and your husband or wife coming home from work, or from picking up the kids or from see their friends?
As you hear them arrive at the door, what feelings does that sound create in you? Are you happy, excited, not bothered, annoyed, scared?
Now ask the other question.
When YOU are arriving back to the house, and your spouse hears YOU arrive at the front door - what feelings does it create in THEM?
Often we come in the front door focused on ourselves, the day WE have had. We expect things from the other person, whether we want them to serve us, or give us space or listen to us or leave us alone - we think about what WE want.
Over time this can get pretty ugly, eventually your spouse isn't excited about you coming home, eventually your spouse doesn't look forward to you coming home, eventually they don't want you to come home, eventually... they aren't there when you do come home.
God teaches us about relationships, he describes in Ephesians 5 how marriage is designed. We are supposed to love the OTHER person, not try and drain them in service of US.
Try the Front Door Test. When you arrive at the front door...
Give them a reason to want you home.